You have got to see Georgia Tech sophomore Nick Selby's welcome to the North Avenue trade school's 2013 freshman class. It's like a battle speech from Braveheart re-enacted by Screech from "Saved by the Bell" and scored by Richard Strauss. Here are some of the best lines, with a little Bulldog Nation commentary:

"We chose Georgia Tech because we want to do the impossible."

You mean get laid?

"Georgia Tech is proud of many traditions, but the one I find most exciting is..."

The football team losing to Georgia.

"If you want to build the Iron Man suit, you're at Georgia Tech. You can do that."

But if you want to find a job that doesn't require you to wear a pocket protector, no, you can't do that.

"Congratulations on your acceptance."

And sorry you couldn't get into UGA.

H/T Reddit via Gawker

UPDATE: Sadly, this speech may have been plagiarized. At Georgia Tech, you can do that!