Zoolander 2 is as old and out of style and touch as has-been supermodels Derek Zoolander (Ben Stiller) and Hansel (Owen Wilson) are portrayed to be in the movie. Fifteen years too late, Stiller returns to a well that subsequent viewings of his 2001 comedy proved had long ago dried up. In seclusion after the death of his wife and loss of his son to social services, Zoolander comes out of retirement to solve the mystery of the murdered pop stars, a gag allowing the movie to open with the death of Justin Bieber. 

Cameos like that of the Biebs are what Stiller relies on instead of edgy or even funny humor. The movie’s only real laughs are created by Will Ferrell, who reprises his role as criminal fashion designer Jacobim Mugatu. Unfortunately, his turn is delayed until late in the movie due to his imprisonment. A late turn to satanic fashionista ritualism salvages the last act, but the unfunny damage of the first two acts is simply too great to undo. To paraphrase Mugatu’s famous line from the original, Zoolander is so not hot right now.