Since the dawn of modern humans’ time on earth, wizened elders have shaken their fists at rebellious youth, who volley back an eye roll. It’s an unshakable and predictable turn through the seasons of our lives. A child is born tabula rasa. It grows curious and strong and dangerous. If it survives, it pairs with another for long enough to create one of its own. It learns to be cautious for the sake of its own curious and dangerous child. It grows older and wiser and begins to offer its lessons on caution without being asked. Dangerous children roll their eyes until they too learn to be cautious, on their own, the hard way. The circle completes with Dangerous shaking its fist at Danger.

The context may change through history, but the major moves are fixed. Today, tradition carries on with “OK boomer.” When I was dangerous, I rolled my eyes and said “whatever” before turning back to Fight for [my] Right to Paaaaaaaarty! Before that, Dylan howled at the watchtower. Imagine grandpa at dinner after surviving the great plague of the 14th Century. “When I was your age, I had to bury my entire village!” And so on, and so on.

In their defense, millennials have been bottle-fed the curds of the college degree and company job for too long. Real-world education tells them that a college degree is now a luxury item that might sink them into debt for the rest of their lives. And for what? Holding the same single job for the length of time required for a sustainable retirement is nothing but nostalgia. Even the fabled benefits of the University Job can’t hold up against an approaching reality in which people have to work two or more jobs for the rest of their lives. I will not be enjoying retirement right along with you.

But boomers were once young, too. Millennials might have even enjoyed FaceTiming with them. They were, in fact, one of the most rebellious generations in modern memory. They established modern activism to fight “The Man,” and were pretty successful! They actually called out and canceled, in real life, many forms of institutionalized hatred. They also wrote the canon on isms, and it should be no surprise that in the autumn of their lives, they added “ageism” to the list. Those who weren’t occupying spaces and un-occupying their clothes were getting sent far away to die fighting strangers in a strange war against their will. I raise my glass.

So, let’s make a holiday toast. Here’s to giving each other a break from this ancient tradition! Let’s step outside of ourselves and try to conjure the smell of the burning bras of our youth. Remember how strong and open-minded we are, and let’s learn something new and uncomfortable. It will keep us young. And though things may be economically tough right now, rather than lament the state in which things were left to us, let’s think about how we might leave things for generations after us. 

Sound easy? Ask a boomer. Then, ask a boomer to show you how to can a food item, and do it together! Then, very patiently, show them how to login to whatever accounts their computers “won’t let them” login to. We were all young once, and I’m all for the tradition of growing old. Fa la la la la, la la la la!